Planning your wedding can be a lot of fun but it can stress you out too, especially if you feel pulled in many directions. While a marriage is the joining of two families, that can also mean pressure from two families to do things their way. The problem? You and your future spouse want to do things your way!
It is your wedding but the more people contribute ideas (and in many cases money to pay for the wedding), the tougher it can be to eliminate outside influences. Still you need to be true to yourself and do your best to have your wedding, your way.
Often that means prioritizing what’s important for you; spending what you can afford; and not giving in to pressure to change your wedding vision. If you’re flexible on certain issues, like the font on your invitations or the candy given as a favor, let your family members help make those decisions.
Think it’s too difficult to plan an inexpensive wedding? Don’t be intimidated! Dee and Pat Holleran, who married in 2009, planned their nuptials for under $5000.
They had a religious ceremony at St. Leo’s Catholic Church in Columbus, Ohio, followed by a reception at a local Italian restaurant. The food and drink for 150 guests, which included lasagna, chicken alfredo, spaghetti salad and bread, totaled $2500. They saved on a cake-cutting fee by serving cupcakes.
The venue had a bar, so Dee and Pat served beer from kegs, as well as red and white wine. “Anything else you bought yourself,” says the bride.
Dee purchased her wedding dress on eBay. The “mermaid dress with pearl straps” and a two-foot train, valued at $700, only cost $89. She got a deal because the dress shop went out of business and the owner “sold inventory for pennies on the dollar,” says Dee, who bought her shoes at a second hand store.
Photo by: Teresa Turay, PICS
The six bridesmaids wore black, tea-length dresses of their own choosing. One bridesmaid purchased her dress at a consignment store and another from a retail dress store. To coordinate the bridesmaids’ looks, Dee bought each of them matching shoulder wraps. The groom and his six groomsmen wore rented kilts, a nod to the groom’s Irish heritage.
Dee handled at all the wedding décor on her own, including buying 23 centerpieces at a dollar store, painting and decorating them and accenting the finished centerpieces with candles.
She also made seven bouquets and seven boutonnieres. She bought corsages. Her fresh and faux flowers bill was a few hundred dollars.
For entertainment, Dee, Pat and their guests enjoyed music from an Irish folk band, which the groom’s family hired as a gift to the bride and groom. The couple paid $1000 for photography.
Overall, Dee and Pat didn’t spend a lot of money and enjoyed a memorable day with their family and friends.
Don’t feel like you have to do things the way every other couple does. If you don’t want a receiving line, don’t have one. Can’t stand cake? Serve pie for dessert. Want to dance a hip-hop routine for your first dance? Go for it!
When the catering manager shows you the dinner menu, ask if you can customize it (it’s not always more expensive either)! You can probably swap out rice for mashed potatoes or a Caesar salad for a garden one.
Make sure you have fun too. For example, show some personality by offering your favorite candies at the sweets table. If you adore licorice and your guy likes chocolate, serve both of those and other treats too. Explain your sweet choices with a sign at the candy display, such as “The bride & groom’s guilty pleasures: Megan’s love for licorice and Chris’ favorite chocolate bar.”
Dance the night away with family and friends, listening to all your music picks. Have a blast taking pictures too, wedding selfies, included! If you have a photo booth, stock it with lots of cool props that appeal to you and your guy, such as hats and jerseys for your sports’ teams or glam get-ups like feather boas and costume jewelry.
Whatever you choose to serve, wear or do on the big day, your wedding is your chance to shine. Add in moments that “speak to you” and all your guests will nod in approval, knowing the wedding is all about you, the newlyweds.